1. Don’t cross your arms or legs – You have probably already heard you shouldn’t cross your arms as it might make you seem defensive or guarded. This goes for your legs too. Keep your arms and legs open.
2. Have eye contact, but don’t stare – If there are several people you are talking to, give them all some eye contact to create a better connection and see if they are listening. Keeping too much eye-contact might creep people out. Giving no eye-contact might make you seem insecure. If you are not used to keeping eye-contact it might feel a little hard or scary in the beginning but keep working on it and you’ll get used to it.
3. Don’t be afraid to take up some space – Taking up space by for example sitting or standing with your legs apart a bit signals self-confidence and that you are comfortable in your own skin.
4. Relax your shoulders – When you feel tense it’s easily winds up as tension in your shoulders. They might move up and forward a bit. Try to relax. Try to loosen up by shaking the shoulders a bit and move them back slightly.
5. Nod when they are talking – nod once in a while to signal that you are listening. But don’t overdo it and peck like Woody Woodpecker.
6. Don’t slouch, sit up straight – but in a relaxed way, not in a too tense manner.
7. Lean, but not too much – If you want to show that you are interested in what someone is saying, lean toward the person talking. If you want to show that you’re confident in yourself and relaxed lean back a bit. But don’t lean in too much or you might seem needy and desperate for some approval. Or lean back too much or you might seem arrogant and distant.
8. Smile and laugh – lighten up, don’t take yourself too seriously. Relax a bit, smile and laugh when someone says something funny. People will be a lot more inclined to listen to you if you seem to be a positive person. But don’t be the first to laugh at your own jokes, it makes you seem nervous and needy. Smile when you are introduced to someone but don’t keep a smile plastered on your face, you’ll seem insincere.
9. Don’t touch your face – it might make you seem nervous and can be distracting for the listeners or the people in the conversation.
10. Keep you head up - Don’t keep your eyes on the ground, it might make you seem insecure and a bit lost. Keep your head up straight and your eyes towards the horizon.
11. Slow down a bit – this goes for many things. Walking slower not only makes you seem more calm and confident, it will also make you feel less stressed. If someone addresses you, don’t snap you’re neck in their direction, turn it a bit more slowly instead.
12. Don’t fidget – try to avoid, phase out or transform fidgety movement and nervous ticks such as shaking your leg or tapping your fingers against the table rapidly. You’ll seem nervous and fidgeting can be a distracting when you try to get something across. Declutter your movements if you are all over the place. Try to relax, slow down and focus your movements.
13. Use your hands more confidently – instead of fidgeting with your hands and scratching your face use them to communicate what you are trying to say. Use your hands to describe something or to add weight to a point you are trying to make. But don’t use them to much or it might become distracting. And don’t let your hands flail around, use them with some control.
14. Lower your drink – don’t hold your drink in front of your chest. In fact, don’t hold anything in front of your heart as it will make you seem guarded and distant. Lower it and hold it beside your leg instead.
15. Realise where you spine ends – many people (including me until recently) might sit or stand with a straight back in a good posture. However, they might think that the spine ends where the neck begins and therefore crane the neck forward in a Montgomery Burns-pose. Your spine ends in the back of your head. Keep you whole spine straight and aligned for better posture.
16. Don’t stand too close –one of the things we learned from Seinfeld is that everybody gets weirded out by a close-talker. Let people have their personal space, don’t invade it.
17. Mirror - Often when you get along with a person, when the two of you get a good connection, you will start to mirror each other unconsciously. That means that you mirror the other person’s body language a bit. To make the connection better you can try a bit of proactive mirroring. If he leans forward, you might lean forward. If she holds her hands on her thighs, you might do the same. But don’t react instantly and don’t mirror every change in body language. Then weirdness will ensue.
18. Keep a good attitude – last but not least, keep a positive, open and relaxed attitude. How you feel will come through in your body language and can make a major difference. For information on how make yourself feel better read 10 ways to change how you feel and for relaxation try A very simple way to feel relaxed for 24 hours.
You can change your body language but as all new habits it takes a while. Especially things like keeping you head up might take time to correct if you have spent thousands of days looking at your feet. And if you try and change to many things at once it might become confusing and feel overwhelming.
Take a couple of these body language bits to work on every day for three to four weeks. By then they should have developed into new habits and something you’ll do without even thinking about it. If not, keep on until it sticks. Then take another couple of things you’d like to change and work on them.
Labels: body language, personality development
NONVERBAL BEHAVIOR INTERPRETATION
Brisk, erect walk Confidence
Standing with hands on hips Readiness, aggression
Sitting with legs crossed, foot kicking slightly Boredom
Sitting, legs apart Open, relaxed
Arms crossed on chest Defensiveness
Walking with hands in pockets, shoulders hunched Dejection
Hand to cheek Evaluation, thinking
Touching, slightly rubbing nose Rejection, doubt, lying
Rubbing the eye Doubt, disbelief
Hands clasped behind back Anger, frustration
Locked ankles Apprehension
Head resting in hand, eyes downcast Boredom
Rubbing hands Anticipation
Sitting with hands clasped behind head, legs crossed Confidence, superiority
Open palm Sincerity, openness, innocence
Pinching bridge of nose, eyes closed Negative evaluation
Tapping or drumming fingers Impatience
Steepling fingers Authoritative
Patting/fondling hair Lack of self-confidence; insecurity
Tilted head Interest
Stroking chin Trying to make a decision
Looking down, face turned away Disbelief
Biting nails Insecurity, nervousness
Pulling or tugging at ear Indecision
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Well if we turn over and look at the indian politics we see lot of corruption. Corruption in everythingstarting from a hairpin to a costly car. U can ask how do u relate corruption in such things to politicians.. every politician is spending a lots and lot of money in the businesss called political.. For them it is an business. To gain the money which they invest in this they enter into the world of corruption.The permit non quality products into the market.. They need only money..
Most of the politicians are illitrate.. They dont have much kowledge on their field.. they dont know what is the latest trends in todays world and what they have to import to our coutry.. So that many technology has not been implememted in our country..
Think a person who is a doctor is becaming a health minister,he knows everything about that field and he can implement everything..
As per my view a service minded litrtate can do much better then a illeterate can do in politics
I heard from someonre that a lady doctor appeared for civil service examination and selected for the most conveted Indian Administrative service. There where people who felt that lady doctor could have pursued some arts group to became an IAs officer and she should not study a course in medicine.It is sheer waste of time to study medicine to understand the nuances of administrative services and also the lady medical doctor could have paved the way for someone else to pursue the course in medicine. After all, a medical doctor should try alleviate the suffering of anyone and everyone. But the IAs aspirant felt if she had sought a position as medical officer in some preliminary health centre which does not have proper infrastructure,nursing staff,equipment or medicines.Even a very sincere doctor can only prescribe medicinesand sen patients away.Hence,lady doctor choose the civilservice and she was posted as sub collector and a Collector of district,later.A large number of primary health station come under her jurisdication. As a medical doctor ,she could understand the difficulties faced by the villagers and she could order the building up of infrastructure and ensure other facilities in all primary health centres in entire distirct.She could understand better minimum health care facilities in every Primary Health Centre.
The old saying 'TO serve humanity is to serve GOd' is very true.An IAS officer has a status and power in society and allied duties and responsibilitie.Do you want to serve the people better? THen you can become an IAS officer.If you plan meticulously,you can always succed.Hardwork,Determination,Dedication,Sincerity,Possitive thinking,Systematic and atrategic planning,preservances and patience help any IAS aspirant.
Labels: Civil service, IAS
